Highly inefficient accident

Does everyone know what a pain compact fluorescent bulbs are to clean up if one should break?

Yesterday afternoon Jett was up from his nap before Jude and was playing alone in and around his toy box in the living room while I was in the kitchen.  It wasn’t too long before I heard a loud crash.  Jett had knocked over the end table lamp next to the toy box.  The lamp crashed down, the shade flew off and the high efficiency light bulb shattered against the wall and landed in shards in the carpet.  I ran into the room right away, discovering what had made the loud noise.  I quickly picked up the bulk of the bulb and picked through the carpet to find all the pieces of the bulb, gathering everything in my bare hands.  I picked up all the remains and put it into a zip lock bag.  Somewhere in my brain, I’d remembered someone talking about how the bulbs were pesky to dispose of so I looked online and found the EPA guidelines for disposing of a broken bulb:

Is this a joke?  Do people know this?  By the time I read this information, I was way too late for steps 1 & 2.  As I read through these steps I wondered how I acquired such a dangerous device.  Did I mark a checkbox somewhere along the way attesting to reading and understanding the terms of use?  Was there some kind of government permit that I unknowingly applied for and was granted in order to possess such a toxic substance?  Surely there must be some mistake.